This Just In

• Pens lose to the Devils 4-0. That Brodeur kid's gonna be good.
• The Boy Mayor Wins!!! Let me say this about that: First, anyone who thought the students were ever going to have to pony up a dime, clearly shouldn't have the pointy scissors without supervision. That tax never would have survived a court challenge and methinks meknows Master Luke knew that all along. That never was the intent. The aim was, obviously, to get the "non-profits" to come up with the cash but, more obviously they weren't gonna pay voluntarily. So Junior comes up with a plan where the only possible outcome is win-win for everybody involved (and when I say Junior, I, most obviously, mean the guys behind the curtain turning the cranks and pulling the levers). The schools look like they can play well with others and Lukey gets to look like he's the one with the balls to make the hard decisions and the tough choices to save the city. That being said,  the only reason they went after tuitions in the first place was because they knew it was the politically safest route. What were those kids gonna do, anyway? It's not like the first thing out-of-towner students do is register to vote when they come to town. What are they gonna do, vote against Steellerstahl next time? In a related story.....
  
• Bob Smizik writes that, according to a bunch calling themselves Advanced NFLStats, the onside kick in the fourth quarter against the Packers was statistically the smart move. Are we to believe that while it appears that da Stillers are working on their Buccos-stinking-up-the-joint impression, they are, instead playing based on sound mathematical reasoning? Really?
• You may remember the story about the 10 year-old Arkansas girl who was tasered, in her home, by an officer that was summoned because Mama Bear couldn't get Baby Bear to go to bed. In the interest of fairness, (and we are nothing if not fair) we bring you this from above the Mason-Dixon: Boston mom calls 911 over son's video game habit 

(Police spokesman) Zanoli says the mother's 911 call over video game obsession "was a little unusual, but by no means is it surprising - especially in today's day and age when these kids play video games and computer games."

Amazing. Truly Amazing.