Top of the Food Chain Edition

So it's one of my usual jumpin' Saturday nights. I'm wandering around online with the Pirate game on for background noise, Rockies 9-7 but I kinda like the McCutchen kid, and I made a stop at asathecomic's spot on youtube. Asa's a comic from Minneapolis and puts up alot of funny stuff. Admittedly, I don't quite get all the shots he takes at rappers/hip-hoppers in his spoof vids (I'm not quite the demographic) but it's funny nonetheless. Anyway, I clicked on this clip: Not sure that it's 41/2 stars funny, but whatever. In case you missed it, President Savior went all ninja on a fly during a recent interview: Reading PETA in the title of that clip reminded me that they issued a release condemning the senseless slaughter of this creature. Now, if you made it all the way down to the Obama portion of that link, you're probably thinking what I am, to wit:

• I don't know who Banksy is, but he seems like a douchebag.
• What the phuck is a Sea Kitten and is it really a phriend?
• Guevara's grandaughter got me hankerin' fer some carrots.

and...

• Seriously... what the f*&k is wrong with "comedian" Andy Dick??

Andy is a comedian/actor struggling to maintain D-List status. I've seen him and thought he was kinda funny in shows like Newsradio and The Andy Dick Show. Now you can find him mainly on the celebrity roasts on Comedy Central acting like a complete douchenozzle. I mean Courtney Love looks at him and says "Dude you're fucked up!"

Anyway, at :46 into the clip, a seemingly articulate and intelligent woman starts talking about how PETA isn't trying to get everyone to go vegetarian but they just want McDonald's to "consciously" slaughter chickens in a more humane way. Maybe she's right. I guess being scalded, debeaked, or defeathered alive would suck. I guess there probably is a better way to kill the poor chickens. Maybe we could drive them to suicide by making them sit through an Andy Dick Film Festival. Maybe we could have them buzz the President during his interviews. Whatever it takes. But, just when she just about has me, Miss PETA starts yapping about how we shouldn't treat the chickens like we're superior (cuz we're not) and how we're here to co-exist. Whaat?? Listen folks, don't think for a minute that, if given the chance, you wouldn't find your nuggets covered in dipping sauce in the hands of some chicken. Arnold Ziffell slathering you up with KC Masterpiece. Some bovine Bobby Flay whipping up a batch of Sloppy Joes, or Marks, or Petes.

Were it not for opposing thumbs to yank the food chain, Miss Peta lady, Hooters would be much different place.